I just spent a couple of days with Seth Godin, the author of Tribes and Purple Cow.    While there are several thoughts and illustrations from our time together captured in my notes, there is one idea that I have circled with the message, “Write blog.”  This is my attempt to convey what I was pondering when I drafted my message.

Give yourself permission to fail.  I don’t mean permission to fail at small things like picking up the kids late from school or forgetting to pack toothpaste for your road trip (I do these things regularly).  I mean the kind of big failures that cause your friends and family to whisper, “What was he/she thinking?”

Each year, I meet dozens of talented and educated people in their 20’s and 30’s who are looking for the role they should play in society.  Having been raised in a culture where failure is considered a character flaw, they have been trained to be...

Twice a year I have the privilege of gathering for a few days with some of the greatest leaders in the world. There is so much information and wisdom available, but it is not just about hearing others tell you how to be a great leader. There are always things to do. For example: lesson one, day one……everybody gives a speech. Not everyone there is or wants to be a public speaker, including me. As a matter of fact, studies reveal that most people report their number one fear to be public speaking, second on the list is death. As Jerry Seinfeld once pointed out, this means that at a funeral, the average person would rather be in the coffin than giving the eulogy.  Okay, okay…I digressed.

Nevertheless, the point is, there is no getting out of this speech. When your time is up, all eyes are on you. In that moment, you can choose to focus on looking good or you can choose to focus on making progress.

Honestly, my default approach...

As a kid, I was often told that being the boss made you a leader. A boss sits atop the organizational chart and tells people what to do and how to things get done. At 18 years old, I had the opportunity to host a talk radio program for teens and college-aged students. I quickly found people to work for me and I built a team of 12 people. Unfortunately, I was a great boss but a lousy leader. I didn’t understand the answer to the question: What is leadership?

Within a few months, our program had become the number two most listened to program in our region. This seemed to solidify my understanding of leadership. I was barking out orders, people were following them, and the organization grew in listeners each week. However, it didn’t take me long to realize that my team didn’t do anything unless I told them what to do and they didn’t really like being told what to do. It was especially tough to lead those who had recently discovered their minor celebrity...

As a young girl, I remember how empowered I felt when someone challenged me. The power that came from my belief that I could be the best at anything I wanted to do. I was a runner and I believed that I could always learn to run faster and further in order to win. I knew it would take a lot of hard work and practice, but I never doubted that I could achieve the results I wanted……winning. I pushed myself everyday to get better and I did, but I didn’t just apply this philosophy and belief to running. I applied it in every aspect of my life and eventually, ‘winning’ wasn’t always possible. The older I got, the more I experienced situations where winning just wasn’t going to happen and no matter how good I was, there was always someone, somewhere better at it than me. The more I lost, the less I tried.

At a crucial turning point in my life I realized I no longer saw challenges as something I could overcome. As a...